July 28, 2004


Tulip girl recently posted about a theory of parenting called Babywise that I feel teaches nothing less than cruelty to children. Babies have become seriously ill because parents have used this system of childrearing. I thought it had long since fallen out of favor. Unfortunately, I am apparently wrong. New parents seeking any advice that they can sometimes fall for the bullcrap in this book that takes the place of good common sense, love, and a mother's good instincts.

I'm not going into it the theories. I think the link I provided gives enough evidence against its use (as well as similar techniques.)What I will tell you as a mom of five is this:

Babies cry for a reason. They have a problem and they need the problem fixed. They may be thirsty, or hungry, or tired, or need a diaper change, or have a tummy ache or just want the warmth of your arms about them, as they miss the closeness of the womb.
Don't fear spoiling your little ones. A few minutes of mild crying is okay, sometimes babies need that to fall asleep. But if the crying doesn't stop, gets stroner, or your child really sounds distressed, pick the child up. If you are exhausted from lack of sleep and feel at the edge; mom and dad you need to spell each other, call a good friend and beg for help, get a babysitter for an hour or so a day (even if you can't afford it.Its important.) see if there aren't any "rent a grandma" services in town. Knock on the door of the door of your neighbor who sits on the porch and watches eveyone go by.

And moms,listen to your instincts. So many times they are spot on. If you think something is wrong check it out.

Hugs to all those who were fooled by the book and its bad advice. And thank you tulip for blogging about this subject.


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